its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
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