You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
