That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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