Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize