whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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