I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
