if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
