I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
why is half of my head shaved?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
