D3 body, D1 cock
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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