sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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