Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
