plz talk dirty to me
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
