your thong is hanging out like whoa
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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