Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
