on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize