You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
