Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
