she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
