i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
