now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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