adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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