I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize