Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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