Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
