my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
