these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
