the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I can tuck mytits in my pants
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
