About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I think a kid would responsible me up
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
