There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
