How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
