dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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