Jerry, you need to find god
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize