A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
So vagazzling was a success
God I need to hump something, right now.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
