They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
