Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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