see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
