During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
