Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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