I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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