Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
