I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize