I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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