I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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