I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
