I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Nicole vs. Life
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize