Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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