dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
