I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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