So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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