My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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