apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
