bring money and cleavage
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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